Don't Hold Back

I went on a bike ride with two of my friends last week along a random trail we found in the woods near one of our usual running routes.  We knew the trail was hilly from previous experience, but we decided to follow it again anyway.  Upon making it to the end of the trail (and the top of the hills), we turned around and proceeded downward to the bottom.  While going down I realized 1. This is SO much fun. 2. I want to do this again. I was surprised when I got to the bottom and found my friends thinking the same thing! After a sudden agreement, we began our way back up the trail. I was also surprised to find the way up was MUCH easier than the time before, and it was clear to me that it was easier simply because the thrill racing back down was worth the uphill battle. As a child, I never remember getting tired when I ran outside. We would run until we reached the base just happy to not be tagged "it". We didn't care we were tired because... it didn't matter. When a child has a goal, I feel like they refuse to settle until they reach it. Somewhere in-between our childhood and our adulthood, I think we lose part of that determination in ourselves to succeed.  I'm realizing now more than ever that children have no limits. So many people spend their early years wishing to grow up, so it's funny now how so many of us wish we were kids again.  I think that's part of what a lot of us are missing today. I realized it had been far too long since the last time I felt that "thrill". My dad used to pick us up in the backyard and swing us around pretending it was the wind. Racing down the hill without holding back felt a lot like that! People grow up, and people change. I know I've changed, but part of me is still holding onto my inner child in hopes of making my younger self proud of me. Weird, I know..but it's the truth.

What defines a runner?

"If you run, you are a runner. It doesn't matter how fast or how far. It doesn't matter if today is your first day or if you've been running for twenty years. There is no test to pass, no license to earn, no membership card to get. You just run."
                      -John Bingham

I've been running for 8 years now, but for some reason I never consider myself a "runner". I've grown an obsession for it but still I never think I'm doing enough to earn the title.  But then I realized that anyone can be a runner. Most people tell us runners that they could never do what we do. That is false. Many times, as Gandhi quoted, "strength does not come from physical capacity. It comes from an indomitable will." The will to fight until you succeed.
Upon finding out I shouldn't be running due to a tear in my hip, I was crushed. All I ever knew was running. I found myself thinking "Am I no longer considered a runner..?". Well here I am now haven't gone on a distance run since November, and it has been quite the struggle, let me tell you. After so long, it's easy to feel defeated, however, I watched Lolo Jones documentary about her many defeats, and nothing stopped her from pursuing her dream.  Obviously I'm not becoming an Olympic athlete, but seeing her fight made me motivated to never give up.  While I can't wait til I can race again, I think I took for granted my ability to run, so being injured has only made me appreciate it more. 

"The only one who can tell you you can't is you....and you don't have to listen"

I think people get annoyed at me when I talk about running. People used to ask me why I run every day...after trying to explain to them why countless times, I've found that I can never put it into words. I then came to the conclusion that if they need to ask, then they will never truly understand. We were all born to run. As babies we learn to crawl, walk and eventually run. As children we run as fast as we can for as long as we can just in hopes of not being tagged "it". So how did so many of us grow away from our natural born ability to run? 

Could You Live on $1 Per Day?

Could you?  I know I couldn't.  I feel like there are times when we think things couldn't get any worse.  Well guess what...they most certainly could. Why is it so hard for us to be positive sometimes? Why is it so hard to just pause for a minute and appreciate the good in our lives?  After watching a documentary about 4 students going to Haiti to experience life for 30 days how the Haitian people did..on $1 a day, it made me not only appreciate all I take for granted, but it made me want to do more good and serve others. Why does it seem that people who have so little are willing to give so much more than those who seem to have "everything"...?. I think when it comes down to it, it doesn't matter how much wealth you gain or how beautiful your house looks.  What matters most is whether you are happy. Working at a fast food restaurant part time, it's easy to become frustrated at times, but I've come to realize it's all in how you look at it.  We all have the choice when we wake up in the morning whether we will be miserable or happy. In being able to appreciate the littlest things; a compliment from a stranger, a warm smile, or even a simple "thank you", I've found life to be much more meaningful.  We walk through a majority of our lives blinded sometimes finding it a trial just to "get through the day".  I know I'm guilty of it too.  We are so concerned with our busy schedules, we can never take a moment to appreciate the good.

One afternoon after leaving my grandparents, as we drove down the street my dad commented on the beautiful trees.  I barely noticed them or even cared..I meant they're just trees right? Well they were just trees..until my mom remarked that we should take a video to show my granddad who hasn't left his house in over a year due to ALS. I think at that moment I realized the beauty surrounding me everywhere I go not only in nature, but in people as well. We encounter so many different kinds of people throughout our lives. Some are easy to love, but lately I'm realizing how true it is that those who are hardest to love really need love the most. My mom always tells me when I struggle to give people the benefit of the doubt to be patient because you never know what someone's day has held. I've found these words to be so helpful and instead of getting angry at those causing me most frustration, I try to practice loving them instead. What if each day we treated every person we encountered as though they would die tomorrow.  Yeah, it does sound morbid, but let's be real, if we woke up each day thinking "I'm going to change at least one person's life today for the better" or "I'm going to try to make someone's day today", our world would be such a better place! If only we could all just embody the compassion of a child or the kindness of  a stranger putting a few coins in an expired parking meter to save someone from receiving a ticket.



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VGeFpz10baw

here's a link to the $1 a Day video!! It's long, but, trust me, it's worth it.

Keep Smiling

There is hope for the helpless

Rest for the weary

Love for the broken heart

There is grace and forgiveness

Mercy and healing

He'll meet you wherever you are...

I complain much more than I need to.  There are many times when I simply forget to be thankful for all I have.  I forget to look around me and appreciate all my blessings. 

Well. RIGHT NOW would be a perfect example of how I complain too much. Here I am complaining all the time about how I am unable to run for a few months due to a hip injury, while there are so many people who were never able to run in the first place.  They were never able to feel what it's like to get a runner's high or be in the middle of a long run and never want to stop. Even worse, there are those who will never run again. I will run again. I'm being so insensitive.  It just hit me that while I am over here feeling sorry for myself, my  Granddad is completely paralyzed. He used to be a runner.  Sometimes we need to be smacked in the face with these reminders in order to better ourselves.  We need to recognize the pain of those around us before we begin to think of our own pain as so unbearable.  

This song just came on pandora.  But it is so reassuring isn't it? We are never alone.  We will struggle. But we will overcome the struggles.  My sister was a hurdler and told me that the only way to get over a hurdle was to look past it.  In life we will be burdened with difficult situations, but one of the only ways to move on, is to look past them to the future.  During a cross country race I always dreaded the hill that would greet me at the 2 mile mark, but I knew after the hill, the ground would flatten out, and there would be a downhill for me to look forward to.  The same thing applies to life. My coach always told me that we would never appreciate the sunniest and most beautiful of days if we had no miserable and rainy days to compare them to.  We need to recognize and experience the bad in order to fully appreciate the good!

So next time you're about to complain, stop yourself

Instead think of something you are thankful for and smile.

Because life is beautiful...

and there's so much to smile about.

Now's when my life begins!

Well, I think it's safe to say that I am a horrible blogger.  I wrote this in January, and I am literally just getting around to posting it now...but anyway since my last blog I am absolutely loving college.  Being a commuter has pulled me out of my comfort zone and forced me to open up, and that has made all the difference.  Anyway, this past week I was granted the opportunity to be a part of the Focus Conference in Orlando, Florida along with 6,000 other Catholic students.  Several days leading up to the conference, I'll admit it was really the last thing I wanted to do and even tried getting out of it.  However, I reluctantly went along and got on the bus.  Now mind you, this was about an 18 hour bus ride.  I was probably the most stubborn and frustrated person, and I couldn't help but feel completely miserable.  Even once we arrived, I wished I were home. I swear all I did was complain. I went to mass feeling disgruntled and barely made it through hearing the speaker afterwards, because I felt it was a waste of my time.  Then, I woke up on Thursday.  On this day I learned that "small steps can".  I learned the importance of what it means to be joyful in the midst of suffering.  I was told not to just exist, but to LIVE.  Jesus changed our story.  I learned that if He didn't come to redeem everything, He didn't come to redeem anything.  I learned the importance of character.  That living the life of good character is to live the life of freedom.  In determining who our friends are ask yourself: is this me loving my brother/sister or is this me using my brother/sister.  When did it become okay to laugh or find entertainment in the suffering of others.  We are all brothers and sisters.  I learned that it is not happiness we yearn for, but peace.  If you are not living for God, you are not living.  God is peace. To live for God is to find peace.  "Be human. Be humble. Be vulnerable."

On the following day, Friday, I woke up late and unfortunately missed mass.  Little did I know that morning that this would be the most life changing day of my life.  Today I found myself excited to go to each talk.  I learned the importance of love.  Love is being able to say "I love you more today than when we first got married".  We were made to love and made FOR love.  This whole experience was truly a wake up call.  One moment of joy after another.  All my life I've been Catholic.  I've gone through all the motions of being Catholic but never until this past week had I fully understood how much God loved me..and all of us.  I learned that He loves you as you are TODAY.  He is the only one who will truly always be there.  I learned when I am a mess..to go to Jesus!  "Tell God all about it. As you are. Honestly. Constantly."  Who needs a counselor when Jesus is there anytime anywhere?!  I learned to live a life of inspiration.  "I'm a mess, but I'm His mess." That night we had adoration. Now when I saw in the program it would be 2 hours long, I thought it would be almost unbearable.  However after confession, I found myself uncontrollably crying my eyes out when I returned to adoration.  It's a feeling I cannot begin to describe, but I was so overjoyed that I couldn't stop crying!  I had never felt so refreshed and alive and LOVED.  Being among thousands of Catholics who were all praying together made me feel unstoppable.  At this moment, my heart was totally filled with the love of God.  I'm not just saying this.  Cause remember I didn't want to go to adoration? I didn't even want to go on the trip in the first place!! So yeah.  It was an indescribable moment.  They always say that Jesus is always with us and everything, but at that moment there is no doubt in my mind that he was present.

On Saturday, I was so fired up.  I was so ready to get back to reality and change the world.  The speaker in the morning said one of the best quotes I've ever heard.  "Be the best read, the best trained, the best.  Know your facts, quote people correctly.  Be prepared.  Whatever your field, be the best prepared in the room.  They may not agree, but they can never say you're lying."  As simple as a message it is, it stuck with me and continues to motivate me.  I learned that we are all built for a particular service.  "God did not make us to be grumpy!"  I learned that a man has the power in what he does, but a woman has the power in who she is.  Jesus gave us his body last, so why should women give their body first.  I learned that we know we are worth more than the world offers us. THEN the other most life-changing moment of the trip happened in my last impact session talk.  The speaker referred to a time when he and another missionary approached a drug dealer on the street, and while they thought they were looking at Satan himself, they later realized that this man was far from Satan.  He had just never known love.  When they told the man how loved he is by God, the man broke down in tears.  "People think they are animals, but really they have just never known love."  I always struggle with what to do about homeless people approaching me on the streets, but this talk reminded me that Jesus came as a poor man.  If we cannot see Christ through poverty then when will we?  I was reminded that Jesus helped the outcasts.  We must extend ourselves to others.  That is when we will know true happiness.  When you are unhappy with something, change it.  When you think hmm someone should do something about that, ask yourself, is it me?  I learned that Saints haven't fallen from heaven, they've struggled and they've sinned.  They just took action.  To wrap up my day, I learned that if God is king, and I am His daughter, then I am a princess. <3

Our final day at conference, Curtis Martin gave a remarkable speech.  He said that "if you are what you're meant to be, you will set the world on fire".  What's really important is what's next, not what just happened.  We must joyfully embrace our crosses like Jesus did.  And finally he said.. "Repent.  Keep changing your life, and you will change the world."

So, that was a wonderful experience...but unfortunately we had to come back to reality, and it was a smack in the face.  I came back enthusiastic about making a difference in the world, but everyone I knew and talked to was still in the same mindset as before.  "Setting the world on fire" was a lot harder than I expected it to be!  However, I'm learning that it is a gradual experience.  It would take forever for one person to build a house..BUT the more people who contribute and do their part, the quicker the job gets done!